15. May 2015 · Comments Off on Mindfulness · Categories: Chickens, Midwestern Life · Tags: , , ,

Regular readers here may have noticed a change this past six plus months . . . as in this blog didn’t exist.  

I needed to experience a moment of mindfulness in my life and closing up shop for a while was a large part of that.

I learned a few things this past six plus months.

One. You all are on the internet too much.  And by you, I mean me.  When I started this blog my son was six months old and I was looking for a quick social fix, a small creative outlet and a motivation for healthy living.

I made several great friends (I’m looking at you Cinnamon, Aly and Ann) and connected with pantloads of others (brownie points to anyone who knows what kids book “pantloads” comes from.)  But most of those other connections were trite and meaningless.  I’m looking at you Twitter.  Random people follow other random people just for follow backs and randomly comment on random tweets and it all means a pantsload of nothing.  Sorry if you like Twitter and I’ve just offended you.  No, wait, I’m not.  But I am kinda sorry I’m not sorry so that counts for something right?  I also learned Facebook is a giant time and energy suck but I know you all love your Facebook so I’ll refrain from commenting on that further for now.

I do miss my creative outlet and have, to this day, found myself approaching life from a blog mindset.  I’d like to share that thought.  That would be an interesting pic to share.  My chicken died and I’m sad and need to tell someone.  Yes, one of the chickens died.  Technically two of the chickens died but I’m only sad about the one.  But I’ve digressed.  I’ve also learned that I get way more done when I’m just doing and not blogging.  What a revelation, no?  Yes.  A revelation.

I no longer need a motivation for healthy living.  I can do that all by myself and honestly, the healthy living community often runs in cycles of regurgitating the same crap over and over while giving you a guilt complex over not having run enough miles that week.  Plus I just don’t think we need to tell the world every time we do a burpee or eat kale chips.  And by we, I mean you because I don’t do burpees or eat kale chips.  Just do your burpee.  Eat your kale chips.  And get some satisfaction from the doing not the telling.

Two.  I needed to get back to church.  I realize religion is one of those sticky topics like politics we are supposed to avoid at the dinner table, but it’s my neglected food satire blog and I can say what I like here.  I’ve realized denomination means nothing and faith means everything.  I listen to sermons, have joined a women’s bible study and am in general working diligently to be the very best child of God I can be.  It’s not just great for me, but for my kids and my husband as well.  It’s a win win win situation and I encourage you to seek your own connections if you feel there is something crucial missing from your life.

Three.  I like to sew.  Like, really like to sew.  It’s actually one of the reasons I dusted off the blog (well, that and a jackfruit purchase at the market the other day.)  I’ve been linking up some paper piecing work I’ve done to a blog I follow and have been emailing my husband pictures to put on his photobucket account so I could link up.  Crazy.  I can just post a picture here and link them up on my own without wasting any of his time or even much of my own if I keep the chatting to a minimum.  So you’ll be seeing some sewing here.

Four.  Well, there’s lots more but I’ll stop because no one needs to know my thoughts on Victoria’s Secret’s bras or flannel shirts right now.

So . . . . what’s the plan here?  I don’t have one specifically other than I asked my husband to turn off comments here.  Yup.  A blog you can’t comment on.  I am aware this is contrary to every rule of social media but as I kind of think social media is crap these days I’m doing it anyway.  I actually think we are both going to love it.  I can still experience mindfulness since once I’ve hit the post button my obligation ends.  No checking my email to see if anyone has commented.  No firing up the laptop to comment back to the comment because it’s rude not to.  No more thought on the subject.  I can get off my mind whatever I have to say or show and it’s gone with no more thought necessary.  And you?  Well. let’s be honest here . . . commenting is a chore.  You either have to pull out the laptop or deal with tiny @ signs on your tiny cell phone key pad and it’s just a royal pain in the butt.  And for what?  Because we are supposed to?  I have a newsflash for you . . . my blog isn’t earth shattering enough to require commentary or debate.  I’m not looking for companies to send me freebies or to launch a business or to make this a career.  It’s just a little fun here and there.  Plus internet trolls and spam stink like skunks and no one likes skunk smell.

In short, there are no obligations for either of us.  I can post as often or as little or as never again as I like.  You can read as you like or not like.  It’s quite simple and freeing.

And just because I can’t leave you without a picture . . .

Parmesan RW

No, that is not the chicken who died . . . although there is some debate over whether we should eat him or sell him.  Of the five babies we hatched last year, one had a cross beak and passed away and one was killed by the neighbors dog.  Of the three left, we ended up with two girls and a boy.  Oddly enough the above chicken is in fact Parmesan, who I named in case he turned out to be a boy and we had to eat him.  He turned out to be a boy.  We still haven’t eaten him.

Alright, I’m gonna go now because I’d rather be sewing.

– Joanna

Just the other day I convinced you all (except Mavis) that chocolate covered pretzels were the perfect potluck food.  This summer we attended a ham radio field day (yes, The Husband is a ham geek but a damn sexy one if you ask me) and I brought my new go-to potluck food. Here’s what was left of them after the first pass.

Plate pretzels RW

Yes, the first pass.  They fared well.  Quite well I think – aside from one guy complaining (joking? it’s hard to tell with ham geek humor sometimes) about mustard pretzels being on the dessert table that is, although I’d like it noted he still took one.  The Husband went back to field day after the kids went to bed for the night and he watched a guy snatch the very last pretzel.  So I guess I was totally right about them being the perfect food to sit out for extended periods of time.

Here’s Sweetey Petey enjoying one in case you need more photographic evidence they were popular.

Plate Pete RW

If you recall I also promised to share the rest of the potluck food. I focused solely on the dessert table for the post.  Yes, yes I did risk looking like a crazy fool in front of a bunch of people who have no idea I have a blog just to snap pictures of half eaten trays of food for you.  Because I love you all.  Or at least like.  I at least like you all.  Or at least most of you.

Anyway, here’s a breakdown of the dessert table.

The generic brownie.  Somebody always brings brownies.  They did okay. Not great, but solidly in the middle.

Plate Brownies RW

Store bought cake.  These did not fare well at all.  Nobody goes to a potluck for store bought cake people, so stay away from bringing these.  They sure were pretty though weren’t they? 

Plate store bought RW

I have no idea what these were.  Some sort of pastry?  It appears to have been pretty popular despite being purchased.

Plate Pastry RW

Apple pie.  Let’s face it, apple pie is always a winner no matter where you go or who you are with. So if you have the time, feel free to make one of these (message me your address if you need a taste tester mmmm K cause I love pie.)

Plate Pie RW

This was some sort of dump cake I think.  It was popular . . .

Plate dump cake RW

. . . so was the chocolate cake with caramel frosting.  Nothing beats a good homemade caramel frosting if you ask me (and apparently all the other folks who devoured this.)

Plate caramel cake RW

Fruit.  I’m tossing this into the dessert category here because it was with the desserts.  I devoured the cherries because cherries are expensive.  Must.  Get.  Money’s.  Worth.  From.  Free.  Potluck.

Plate cherries RW

For the record, the pre-sliced cherries made me look less like I’d been gutting chickens.  I had some blood red fingers after pulling pits out for Sweetey Petey.

Plate fruit salad RW

Watermelon is a classic and somebody always brings it.  It also always gets eaten.

Plate watermelon RW

This used to be cheesecake.  Clearly it was popular.  I bet Paula Deen’s mini cheesecake recipe would be a great option.  You all know that one right?  Quick, easy and already portioned.  I’ll have to keep that in mind . . .

Plate Empty RW

There were chocolate chip cookies too.  I forgot to snap a picture but I tried one.  Despite their claim of being “famous chocolate chip cookies” they were meh if you ask me.

So there you have it.  The potluck dessert table.

– Joanna

P.S.   My mom called me out on my lackluster blogging schedule the other day (over the phone of course since she has no clue how to leave comments.)  So, for the official record here are the reasons I’ve been a bad blogger lately:

1)  I’ve been painting the half finished wall in the Don Draper room (that’s what we call our family/play/TV/bar room.)

2)  I’ve been stripping painted over wallpaper again.  This is actually going faster than the last time I attempted this.  Possibly due to lack of blogging.

3)  I bought a carpet cleaner and have been cleaning the carpets (the Mother-in-Law will be happy about this because she noted the state of my carpets last time they visited.  Yeah, they are bad.  I have two kids and two dogs so they are bad.  Less bad now though thanks to my new Hoover baby.)

4)  I’ve been working on Sweetey Petey’s birthday party.  I am having Chipotle cater it so a lot of the food stress is gone, but I picked a pretty random theme (Giraffe’s Digging) and have not only created my only image for invites, but am also attempting one of those giant plywood cut-outs you stick your face through.  It’ll be of Giraffe’s.  Driving a construction digger.  And it’s gonna be awesome.

5)  I’m 95% sure that 90% of my readers these days are friends or relatives that I’m friends with on Facebook so they know the haps already.

I do still have lots to say and a ton of drafts started and some fun house projects to share eventually.  Very soon I’ll be starting a new series called The Patrick Project as well.  I’ll leave you to ponder on what that might be . . .

Question of the Day:  What do you think The Patrick Project is?? 

Pretzels in the Pan Crop R

Until recently I would have advised you NOT to invite me to your potluck.  I stink at bringing food other people like.  Let’s review my past potluck contributions:

cold quinoa salad with raisins and toasted coconut

brushetta with goat cheese

greek yogurt cucumber salad

marinated feta cheese, olive and cucumber skewers

I thought they were all perfectly yummy, and best of all healthy . . . but no one else ate them.  Any of them.  It’s not that they weren’t tasty or that I’m a bad cook, they were just out of the norm.

I was chatting with my friend Amber a few months ago and she noted she has this same problem.  She’s 100% Paleo and super excited for the food she brings to get-togethers.  Her contributions are super healthy, super within her diet and . . . super unpopular.  Or so she tells me – I go NUTS for her food because she’s an awesome cook.  We commiserated and I explained how I was done sharing food I like and was set on sharing food everybody likes.  Let’s face it, more people share the culinary tastes of my Father-in-Law than me.  It’d be a frigid day in H-E-double-hockey-sticks before I could get my Father-in-Law to eat a cold quinoa salad with raisins and toasted coconut and let’s not even discuss the goat cheese.  I shudder to think what he’d say if I served that to him.

After much debate I’ve recently come up with a solution to my potluck woes.

I’d like to introduce you to the perfect potluck food . . . dun dun duuuuuuun . . .

CHOCOLATE COVERED PRETZELS!

Pretzels Crop R

I have reasons people, oh do I have reasons!

Pretzel Title RW

One.  Who doesn’t like pretzels?  Nobody, that’s who.  Pretzels even come in gluten-free versions if that’s an issue.

Two.  Who doesn’t like chocolate?  Nobody, that’s who.  Chocolate even comes in vegan versions if that’s an issue.

Three.  They are fast and easy to make.  Melt chocolate.  Dip pretzel.  Top if desired.  Done.

Four.  They can be made last minute.  Keep a bag of pretzels around the house and some chocolate and you are always ready to go, no special trip to the grocery required.

Five.  They are completely customizable to any and every occasion.  That’s right.  Every occasion.  Wilton candy melts come in a ridiculous amount of colors to account for every holiday, graduating seniors class colors, birthday theme, season and more!  For formal occasions or to appear fancy, use more expensive chocolate.  Dip your pretzels in a mix of white chocolate, milk chocolate and dark chocolate and you’ve got every type of chocolate lover covered.  And toppings!  Yes, let’s discuss toppings.  Crushed peppermint for Christmas.  Toasted pecans for Thanksgiving.  Green sprinkles for St. Patty’s Day.  Yellow sprinkles for summer.  Orange sprinkles for fall.  Red and blue sugar on white chocolate for Fourth of July.  I could go on but there isn’t enough room on the internet  to list all the options.

Six.  They are portable.  They store well, travel well, there’s no messy sauces to deal with and they are easy to grab a serving off the picnic table.  They won’t go stale, get soft or slimey or squishy and they have a shelf life that makes them just as tasty for a second helping when that fabulous party extends late into the night.  Plus, if by some miracle, there are any left and you take them home there’s no need to be concerned about contracting botulism from them sitting out on a table for hours and hours.

Seven.  They are pretty.  Yes, pretty.  Presentation is half the battle and the better they look the more likely they’ll end up on that disposable plate instead of that plain old generic brownie default.

Eight.  If you have kids, they can help! Get them dipping and rolling and you’ve not only got your potluck portion covered, but you’ve gotten your kids in the kitchen, kept them entertained and covered craft time.

Nine.  They really aren’t that bad for you.  Sure, chocolate covered pretzels aren’t exactly on par with eating a salad, but the pretzels themselves are low in fat and if you use a super dark chocolate they can be low in sugar too.  Topping with crushed peanuts even offers a protein boost.  Take that generic brownie.

Ten.  I don’t actually have a tenth reason, but nine reasons chocolate covered pretzels are the perfect potluck food sounded less cool than ten so how about you just take my word for it okay?

Pretzels in the Pan RW

Stop back in later for a post on how well these pretzels did at our last potluck . . . as well as how well other dishes fared!

– Joanna

P.S.  If you are asked to bring a side dish to your next potluck . . . well, ignore the request and go ahead and still bring these mmmm K?  No one will be mad once they eat them.  Besides, pretzels are carby and carbs are side dishes so WIN!

Question of the Day:  What’s your go-to potluck dish?

Remember that one time I talked about iguanas and alluded to a blog post I never shared?  Yes, well in that post I never shared I suggested I might mix things up around here and stop playing it so safe (aka not worry about ticking people off and just say what I want to say.)

On that note I’d like to get something off my chest.  No, I need to get something off my chest.  Or out of my underwear. That really would make more sense if you’d read the post.  Sigh.  Let’s just move on shall we?

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but . . .

THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST CHOCOLATE!

You heard me.

THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST CHOCOLATE!

Say it with me.  Let’s not scream it this time, just say it nice and matter of fact like.

There is more to life than just chocolate.

Once more, with expression.

There is more to life than just chocolate.

Specifically I’m talking to my husband and his folks.  Calling them out if you will.  Challenging them to broaden their horizons.  Take a risk, take a gamble, step out of their safe little cocoons and experience ALL there is in life to experience.

Let’s set the scene.

My in-laws came into town (with a ten foot yellow slide and a hideously framed fish picture but those are different stories entirely) for a visit the other day.  We had dinner one night and plans for ice cream the next.  There were three options for ice cream locations.

Option A – The local dairy whip.  Yes, a town favorite but pretty basic soft serve and nothing distinguishable from any other dairy whip.  What it has going for it is location, location, location.  It’s five minutes from home and when you have a baby that gets the fuss in the evenings and a two a half year old that gets a case of the crazies in the evenings this really is a strong selling point.

Option B – Fancy soft serve fro-yo.  Fun flavors and toppings.  The big selling point here (besides the points card which earns me free fro-yo) is all the options.  You can add as many different flavors and toppings to your cup as your hungry heart desires! The possibilities are endless (okay, not really endless but statistically really high)!  Option B is more like ten minutes from home.  Not too shabby.

Option C – Local, French pot ice cream. It’s pretty much the all time best, stick to the roof of your mouth creamy goodness that is worth every dang pants tightening, cellulose inducing calorie.  Its only drawback . . . it’s more like 15-18 minutes from home.  Not bad, but go too close to bedtime and it’s the longest 15-18 minute car ride ever.  Plus it’s kind of on a busy road and Sweetey Petey is a runner.

My husband wanted Option A.  The in-laws tend to get Option C on their own when they visit.  So I pushed for Option B – moderately close to home and with loads of options.  The perfect compromise if you ask me.

Here’s the problem.  Despite the fact that the frozen yogurt came in fun flavors like Orange, Pineapple, Peanut Butter, Brownie Batter, Coconut, Coffee, Cheesecake, Vanilla, Pistachio, Strawberry, Chocolate, Birthday Cake, Blackberry Greek, Salted Caramel and even pre-mixed smoothies . . . my husband and his entire side of the family only got chocolate.  Chocolate.  Just chocolate.  Mike added a few toppings to his chocolate, but his parents?  They were toppingless.  As in without any top.  No sprinkles or nuts or crushed candy or fruit or gummy bears or Swedish fish or marshmallows or coconut or iced graham cracker cookies or brownie bits or nerds or sauces of any kind.

Just.  Plain.  Chocolate.

I’ll admit I myself didn’t go hog wild with toppings, but I never do when I’m letting new to me frozen yogurt flavors shine though.

Yes, you read me right, flavors.  Plural.  With an s people, an s.  That’s the point of these places, to try new flavors!

In my bowl was a combo of cheesecake, coconut and pistachio.  I sprinkled some rainbow jimmies on top for funsies.  Because these places are supposed to be fun.  My fav?  The pistachio!  Followed closely by the coconut and coming up last, the cheesecake.

Fro Yo RW

That’s Sweetey Petey’s cup above mine.  The Husband *gasp* gave him some peanut butter as well.

There was no plain chocolate in my cup.  Because plain chocolate at a fancy fro-yo place is just so vanilla.  I’ll admit the in-laws aren’t notorious for trying new things (remember the kohlrabi debacle) but if ever there was a chance for them, I’d like to think it starts with fro-yo.

I know my M-I-L doesn’t read my blog but my F-I-L does and so do some of their friends.  I say we all band together.  We all band together and double dog dare them to get something other than chocolate next time.  And toppings?  At least one??  Maybe even *gasp* a sauce???  Can they do it????  With a little encouragement I do believe there could still be hope for them yet.

– Joanna

What’s your favorite frozen yogurt topping?

05. August 2014 · Comments Off on August 5th 2014 · Categories: Day By Day, Midwestern Life · Tags: , ,

My exciting life.

Dad by day.

Today’s chosen mode of transportation.

2014.08.05 Scooter RW

– Joanna

What did you do to today?

 

Rural King is awesome.  It is literally astounding the variety of items you can find there.  I mean, the potato chip selection alone is worth the trip!  Yes, that’s a link to previous post I wrote.  Go read it if you don’t recall or are new here.  Or read it again just because.  Go on, scoot scoot.  But come on back because I’m not done.

I’m really thinking this might be a regular series.  We sure go to Rural King often enough to make it a regular series.  Okay, it’s decided.  From now on every time I go to Rural King I’m taking pictures for you; pictures of whatever I find of interest that day.

I can’t believe I didn’t notice this before but there are chicken foot prints painted on the concrete when you walk in.  Either calling or mocking (boock boock boock boock).  In other news Sweetey Petey does an excellent chicken impression these days.

Chicken Feet RW

More chickens.  And ducks.  This time in lawn ornament form.  My now duck obsessed husband seriously wanted the duck statue.  I threatened him with bodily harm, because, well, they’re ugly.  I have standards people.

Rural King Chx Statue RW

Chicken travel cups.   The Husband is actually in the market for a new travel cup but I didn’t quite get the joke.  It’s supposed to be funny right?

Rural King Mug 2 RW

I mean King of the Roost?  No.  Cock of the Walk is a classic but King of the Roost I just don’t get.

Rural King Mug 1 RW

More lawn decorations.  It got me thinking I might do something whimsical outside for the kids to enjoy, but not exactly like this.  Because, well, they’re ugly.

Flower RW

The best part of this trip was the clothing!  Camo overalls but with white ruffles for girls.  My daughter will wear this over my dead body because this may have been the ugliest thing in the store.

Outfit 3 RW

Wait, no.  This may have been the ugliest thing in the store.  No, no, the camo is worse I think.  Hard to decide, really.  There are both so very very bad.

Outfit 1 RW

All the clothes weren’t bad, though.  I’d let my daughter wear this one (after I cut the lace off the top of course.)

Outfit 2 RW

Possibly the most controversial item I found was a drunk Smurfette lounging sluttily in a cocktail glass.  Ummmmm aren’t Smurfs supposed to be for kids?  Smurfette – stop with the come hither stare, stop hiking that dress above your knees and join AA already!!!!

Rural King Smurf RW

It wasn’t all bad this trip.  Petey got to pet a bunny so that was totally cool.

Rural King Bunny RW

See you next time we walk through Rural King!

– Joanna

P.S.  Congrats to a friend who just had her baby!  You know who you are and he is absolutely beautiful!  On a selfish note I’m excited to have another new mom friend I can chat with in the middle of the night because babies don’t sleep.  That whole “sleeping like a baby” cliche is false.  False advertisement I say!

Question of the Day:  What, of all these items, would you be willing to buy?

This will probably be The Husband’s least favorite Throwback Thursday post.  You see, he’s not a huge fan of snakes.  His fear isn’t to the level of Indiana Jones, although anybody lowered into a cavern full of snakes would probably suddenly find themselves petrified of them hard core so maybe that’s a bad example.

I don’t mind snakes so much.  Granted I wouldn’t want to share a bed with one and I don’t live in a climate ripe with Rattlesnakes and Copperheads and whatever other poisonous reptiles slither around in the U S of A so I don’t have much experience to base a fear upon.

So in the spirit of not being afraid of snakes, I’d like to present a picture of me kissing one.

Snake Kiss PM RW

A dead one, but still.  It was alive at one point so it counts.  This was at a job I had post college and I cannot for the life of me recall why my coworker had a real live dead snake at her desk.  Maybe to instill fear?  Don’t mess with the accountant?  I dunno.  Clearly it didn’t work on me.  I also have a stuffed snake on my lap in this picture and I’m pretty sure I still have that fellow floating around the house somewhere.  Hidden of course, so as not to freak out The Husband (ideas for the next first of April are suddenly floating around in my mommy brain right now…)

I do have a few quick snake stories.  At the first house we rented when we moved to town, I left the house one morning to go to work and there was a zebra striped black and white snake curled around the Jeep’s front driver’s side tire.  I went back inside the house to tell The Husband and when I came back out it had slithered away.  Despite a few brief internet searches I’ve never been able to locate the name of that snake.  It sure was pretty though.

My second snake story is creepier.  It was sometime last year and I found a baby snake slithering along the baseboard of the fireplace room.  That’s right . . . INSIDE THE HOUSE.  The Husband was not pleased.  Not pleased at all.  It was only five inches long and very thin but a five inch snake INSIDE THE HOUSE was plenty big enough to panic my manly man of a husband.  My first instinct was to grab the first object I could find to stop it, which turned out to be a dull kitchen knife.  The dull kitchen knife was enough to hold the snake in its place but not enough to inflict damage.  I quickly decided I wanted to inflict damage lest I release him outside and he slither back into the house and bring all his brothers and sisters with him.  So I instructed The Husband to bring me a sharper knife and . . . animal lovers and squeamish people may want to click away now . . . I sawed that tiny little sucker in half.  Which took longer than I thought it would.  Snakes, even five inch ones, are tough and wily little buggers.

The Husband conferred with a neighbor the next day who seemed surprised at our intruder and commented he’d been there 20 years and only seen this happen once before.  I guess that makes us lucky?  Pretty sure The Husband wouldn’t agree with that statement.

– Joanna

Question of the Day:  Snakes.  Yay or nay?  Any snake run-ins to share?

And no, I’m not referring to this blog despite the fact I tweeted a while back that I was giving up blogging.

Only two of you cared by the way.

My official internet besties are Aly and Ann.  Your BFF bracelets will be arriving shortly.  Unless you’d prefer necklaces.

The tragic end is for the bug.  The Bubble Bug.  I posted a pic of him awhile ago but if you don’t want to click over, here it is again.

Bubble RW

He’s cute no?  No.  Not anymore.  I accidentally ran over him with the car.  Whoooooops.

Bug Destruction RW

In memory of the good times we’ve shared . . . Bubble Bug, you will be missed.  (Despite the fact you made a really annoying sound and often got clogged up creating a gigantic bubble butt and got stuck on the paver patio all the freaking time and I had to remove your wings because the bubbles would hit them and pop before they even took off.  Still, we shall miss you.) 

Pete and the Bug RW

Pete and his Bug RW

Bubble Bug Miss You RW

Pete Pushes Bug Button RW

Bug Wand RW

Pete picks up the bug RW

Bubble Bug Bubbles RW

Bug Close Up RW

Bug RW

In other news I’m thinking of upgrading the bug to something even cooler.  Like a Bubble Mower!  (It’s all terrain so the paver patio would be no problem and apparently it has frustration-free packaging.  I don’t know what that is, but it sounds awesome.  Now if only they made frustration-free children . . .)

Bubble Mower R

Get the boy started mowing the lawn early.  The Husband can thank me later.

– Joanna

Question of the Day:  What do you think . . . bug or mower?

I went to bed one night without ducks.  The next morning I woke up and there were ducks.

DSC_0787 RW

Why do we have ducks?  I have no idea why we have ducks.

The boy seems to like them so that’s a plus I guess.

Petey Ducks RW

I seem to recall asking The Husband to hold off on any more lifestock for a little while.

Yet somehow . . .

DSC_0763 RW

. . . we now have ducks.

DSC_0726 RW

My reasoning for not wanting ducks is three fold.

One.  It’s something else to take care of.  Our friends down the way bought a hobby farm, bought a bunch of animals, sold off all the animals, and then sold the hobby farm.  Why?  It took too much time to take care of all the animals.  They have two small kids too so I can relate to the feeling.

Two.  It’s something else to take Mike’s attention away.  I know this sounds suspiciously like number one, but it’s a little different.  Mike is now going to build the ducks a house.  I’d really like him to take the evening fussy shift with the baby instead.  He says he can do both, but I don’t know.  There are six baby ducks and only one baby human so the odds are in the ducks favor.  This brings me to point three.

Three.  Ducks cost money.  Money I’d rather spend on a completely frivolous, just for fun circular fisheye camera lens.  Sure, Mike wrangled a deal and got the ducks themselves for free, but there’s that whole house issue.  How much does a duck house cost?  We’re not planning on adding central air or anything but still.  Mike originally said it would be $65.  After hitting up the lumber yard he said $120.  The final receipt said $165.  And in a separate trip to Lowe’s he snuck in some metal brackets.  Plus we need stain.  The ducks’ house has to match the chickens’ house which in turn matches our house.

Much like Princess Vespa’s luggage, it’s all gotta match!

In any case, we now have ducks.

DSC_0752 RW

At least they’re cute.

DSC_0740 RW

And the boy really likes them so they still have that going for them.

Also, I must confess I have picked a favorite.

DSC_0716 RW Favorite Yellow Arrow

I think he or she has nice eyes.  I’ve named her One of Six.

DSC_0745 RFW

Soooo, yup.  We now have ducks.

DSC_0771 RW

I still don’t have a circular fisheye camera lens though.

– Joanna

Question of the Day:  Who thinks I should have a new fun circular fisheye camera lens??

So I spent some precious kiddio nap time on Monday composing a two page blog post . . . that I’m not sure I’m even going to publish.  I know.  I know.  I hate it when bloggers tease about information they may or may not share with you, like it’s the secret to who really shot JFK or something.  I promise it’s not.  I’m not that connected.  It’s mostly just me venting to myself and getting some sand out of my underwear.

Yes.  Yes, I did reference sand in my underwear.

I also referenced your tush on my cerebral cortex (that totally sounds bad now that I’ve typed it out for a second time), an iguana in a leather jacket (thanks Ann), an iguana in a sundress, a jelly fish, squish, lack of squish, sweating mauve, burned oatmeal, dirty laundry, icebergs, Satirical Saturday, Motivational Monday, dirty tissues, play kitchens, Airstream campers, Twitter, dinner and dating.  Oh and marriage.  I may suggest we all might get married someday.

I have a lot going on in my head clearly and the post isn’t even done yet.

I don’t know why I’m telling you all this other than to let you know you’ve been on my mind.  And not just your tushies on my mind.  Yup, that keeps on sounding weirder doesn’t it?

That’s pretty much all I have to say today.  If you had read my blog post that I haven’t published yet you’d understand.

– Joanna

Question of the Day:  Which is more confusing to you . . . an iguana in a leather jacket or an iguana in a sundress?