This post is a public service announcement.

Midwestern Bite De-Skunk Recipe RW

I find Pinterest mildly annoying, so you’ll know I am serious when I make this request:

Please pin the above picture. Pin it and pin it good.  Pin it hard.  Pin it so it goes viral.  Pin it so all the world can be saved!  Saved from what you ask?  From a dog.  A skunky dog.

Midwestern Skunk Block RW

Ugh.  You heard me.  A skunky dog.

Midwestern Skunked Dog 1 RW

The fateful day was Monday.  Monday February 11.  The Pete had gone to bed for the night, I was preparing to write a blog post and The Husband had just stepped out the back door to spend some man time in his Man Cave.  The Destroyer, whose name has been officially changed to Smelly, accompanied The Husband outside but never made it to the Man Cave.  Something piqued her interest and she was off.  We own several acres so it’s anyone’s guess where exactly she went.

Five minutes later I hear her barking at the front door. I called The Husband on his cell and asked him if he had lost his dog.

Yeah,” he said, “she took off.  Can you let her in for me before she wakes Pete?

Sure,” I said, “no problem.”  Except it was.  It was most definitely a problem.

I let Smelly in and immediately noticed it.  The smell.  It was akin to plastic, but the worst plastic, a burning plastic.  To be honest, my first thought was not the dog.  Our friend John had just posted on Facebook that very morning about a strong plastic smell permeating throughout his house and I was immediately curious as to how his random house smell had managed to travel an hour and a half in one day to become our random house smell.

I called The Husband on his cell again and asked him to come inside as there was a smell.  A bad smell.  In the meantime, Smelly had dashed in madly through the front door, into the fireplace room, veering right to slide crazily through the kitchen and into the back entryway, stopping only when she reached the back door.  She was in search of The Husband.  He came into the house through the back door.

Ugh.  What is that?  It’s worse over here.” he said.

Worse over there?   Oh no.  Oh no, it’s not the dog is it?” I asked.

Oh.”  The Husband sniffed Smelly.  “Oh.  Oh, it’s definitely the dog.  What is that smell?  Skunk?  It’s skunk.  She ran into a skunk.  Ahhh, crap, SHE RAN INTO A SKUNK!  What do we do?

My response was simple.  “Outside.  Take the damn dog outside.  NOW!”  I tossed the Husband a leash and he tied Smelly up on the back deck while I stepped inside to the comfort of the skunk free bedroom and hid.  It was time to decide what kind of person I was.  Do I woman up and help out or continue to hide?

I decided I could do both.  I could help, yet remain a safe distance from the dog.  The Husband had suggested Google, but I went straight to the experts and called the local Emergency Vet instead.  When I explained what our lab had done the tech had only one question for me “Is she a Chocolate Lab?’’

Why yes, yes she is.”

I thought so,” said the tech.  “They tend to be a little crazy.  You should consider a Black Lab next time, they have a much better temperament.

Oh no, this is our last lab.  Ever.  Can you help with the skunk smell?”  Turns out she could.  They had a recipe.  A recipe for a de-skunk-erizer.  It goes like this.

Ingredients:
1 quart hydrogen peroxide
¼ cup baking soda
1 tablespoon Dawn dish soap

The Haps:
Mix ingredients.  Wash only the areas sprayed by the skunk, avoiding the eyes, nose, ears and mouth.  Rinse thoroughly.

Midwestern Soap RW

Great.  GREAT!  No, not great.  I didn’t have all these ingredients.  I only had maybe a half pint of hydrogen peroxide, which was expired, and while I had dish soap, it wasn’t Dawn dish soap.  Did it matter what brand of dish soap???  Not worth the risk.  I had to shop.

I left The Husband outside in the cold to babysit the frantic pooch and drove away.  Away from the smell.  It may have been my subconscious self preservation instincts kicking in, but I drove past the dollar store, past the local mom and pop grocery store and on down the road to the larger chain store.  I told myself I needed the best chance of finding the freshest, most exact ingredients but I’m pretty sure I mostly wanted to get as far away from the situation as possible.  After all, as I was about to drive away The Husband made sure to confirm I would be helping him, right?  Right.  Right-ish.

As an apology for the fact I had already decided I would remain safely upwind and at least ten feet from the dog at all times, I picked The Husband up two bags of Oreos.  He was going to need them.  In fact, I might have one now as I type this post.

Armed with my supplies, I returned home with only one frantic call from The Husband questioning my whereabouts.

I had made the call to the vet, I had internally agreed not to drop the dog off at the pound the next morning, and I had shopped for supplies.  Was that enough help I wondered?  No.  I needed one more thing to really cinch my support.  I suggested to The Husband he run the hose inside from the stationary tub so he could have warm water on this chilly night and I was done!  It was time to pop open the Oreos, grab my camera and watch from a distance.

And watch I did.

I watched as The Husband scrubbed.

Midwestern Skunked Dog 3 RW

And scrubbed.

Midwestern Skunked Dog 2 RW

And scrubbed some more.

Midwestern Skunked Dog 4 RW

After three scrubbings, a collar change and some ribbing by me for The Husband wearing his now 16 year old high school Varsity Tennis warmup sweatshirt (Go New Phila Fighting Quakers!) and what I affectionately call his Dad Pants (they are actual Father-In-Law jeans) Smelly smelled more like a wet dog than a skunky wet dog.  Enough so that I let her sleep in the bedroom that night.  Not near my side of the bed, but in the same room.  I’m adding that to my list of how supportive I was.

Driving down the road a few days later, I passed by this poor fellow.

Midwestern Skunk RW

Don’t judge, but I am secretly hoping it’s Smelly’s skunk.  So this incident doesn’t repeat itself.  Because Smelly doesn’t exactly learn her lessons the first time.  Or the second.  Or the third.  I bought six quarts of hydrogen peroxide just to be safe.

So please, if you have a dog and have any possibility of ever being anywhere within the vicinity of a skunk, for Pete’s sake keep your dog on a leash!!

And keep this recipe as well as a stash of hydrogen peroxide, Dawn and baking soda around just in case your dog ends up like our dog.

Midwestern Skunked Dog 5 RW

Thanks to Cinnamon at Eat Pray Tri for hosting 23 Paws this month.

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I am glad that through her my message will reach even more pet owners.  Oh, and Cinnamon . . .

Dog Bone Cartoon

– Joanna

Question of the Day: What’s the worst thing your pet has done?

21 Comments

  1. While I found this to be a fascinating story, I was mesmerized by those great looking jeans. Go fighting Quakers! Also, the mother-in-law and I were just about to go looking for our own chocolate lab, now I guess we’d better get a black or tan one. Thanks for the tip.

  2. Thanks for sharing 🙂 we get a lot of skunks here and the dogs will suddenly go crazy at the door trying to get out, luckily they have never been skunked, but think I might stock up on the supplies just in case

  3. Poor Sadie pup pup.

    This is the first I’ve seen the pics. She doesn’t look very happy with her nighttime bath.

  4. O.M.G. I feel for you guys, I really do, but this post was HYSTERICAL. Absolutely hilarious. I was nearly crying I was laughing so hard!

    • Feel for Mike, not me . . . I was upwind 😉 And I made Mike scrub the kitchen floor when he was done scrubbing the dog. It kinda smelled like skunk too. Poor guy. At least he had some Oreos.

  5. I have officially pinned it. 😀 Although, no fun pet stories here…the worst might have been when one of our cats would spray in my brother’s room every time a stray cat would come near the house.

  6. Greetings from The Principality of Monaco Madame Joanna! I noticed that you just started following my twitter feed and the Twitter breadcrumb trail brought me to your blog. I just love the way you write and your skunky dog post. I can hardly wait to read more!

    • Love the term “Twitter breadcrumb trail” … it’s very accurate Thanks for stopping by. You have such beautiful photographs on your blog I hope I can measure up! I promise I take better pictures of food than I do of skunky dogs 😉

  7. The Husband had already told me briefly about the incident before reading this, not as much detail though.

    Amen on the Black & Tan. Budweiser Crown is pretty good too, although I’ve only had one bottle.

    The most annoying thing, or WORST thing our black lab did was eat his own deposits. Not only that, but our youngest one’s droppings too. Buddy would wait, sneak up on little Wally Bear, and it no sooner hit the ground and…well, you know the five second rule…

    • Ewwww. Just ewww. That definitely calls for a beer . . . or a dog psychologist. BTW, we used your box idea for removing the kitchen cabinets and it worked PERFECTLY! You may be just as handy as Tim. You might even be handier. How are you at building shelves? If you can best Tim on shelf building I will officially declare you the handiest person I know!!!

      • Well, I built a closet in our mud room, built floor to ceiling shelves in 2 story garage at old house, and the same in the barn, plus a second story (loft) above my workshop in the barn.

        Back to the dog…we had to put the sh!t eating beast down, so now we just have the two watch dogs!

  8. That is the same ratio I had to use on Emma (our white Basenji mix) when she tangled with a skunk here in CO. However, she must have walked right up on it because I don’t think it even had distance or range to spread… the whole foul-smellong mess was right on the underside of her neck. And the pics I have of her show just about the same expression as Sadie has in her eyes.

  9. Wouldn’t it be nice to have skunk powers for a while? If someone pissed you off you could give them a quick shot of stink and then they’d have to go home and bathe for ages? Would have been kind of nice for a few of the customers at my old job.

    • I was just telling The Husband the other day I thought skunks had one of the best defense mechanisms out there! I wonder if the skunk smells after spraying his attackers or if he even cares if he smells??

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