To digress. To turn aside from the main subject of attention.

I do this. A lot. But I don’t like to say that I do.

I browse numerous blogs and have seen the statement “I digress” more times than I can count on my fingers and toes (it must be a lot then). I cringe a little whenever I read it. I tend to ramble and shy off course myself so I thoroughly enjoy and appreciate a good tangent. My attention span is shorter than Paris Hilton’s skirt and hopping around in a blog post usually keeps me interested.

Goats. Pretty, pretty goats.

Anyway, if too much time was spent describing what toppings the blogger put on her oatmeal (can we just euthanize the subject of oatmeal for awhile people?), I am probably going to skip on ahead anyway.

So, go ahead, digress. Digress your heart out! Just don’t tell me that you did it.

I would like to suggest just digressing. Do it quietly, unassumingly, humbly, and then go about your business or find another word. If you are supercalafragalisticexpialadoshus excited and just have to talk about it, perhaps use a variation of “I digress.” “I digressed,” for instance would work, quite well in fact, as the digression has already been done. Simple, to the point. Kinda like, “I farted.” We don’t necessarily need to talk about it, but it happened. Or how about “that was my digression.”

Digression’s popularity is way lower

than digress’s

so that makes it fresh and new and one of the cool kids now.  Maybe try “I segued.” Or “I segwayed.”

Hey, it has wheels, so it gets you to your next point that much faster.

I segway badly. Now let’s talk about ricing stuff.

If you are looking to sneak more vegetables into your meals or looking for a grain replacement like my Paleo Husband, try ricing your veggies!  It’s so simple.

Broccoli rice for instance.

Wash, pat dry, place in your food processor and pulse till “rice” sized.  Microwave for seven minutes.  This version is then sauteed with a jar of roasted rosemary cherry tomatoes from last years garden.  Oh, and topped with grated parmesan cheese!  I served it with apricot chicken and asparagus for a heaping plate of healthy.

You don’t have to stick with the green veggies though.  White veggies work well too.  Cauliflower can be prepared the same way.  Wash, pat dry, place in your food processor and pulse till “rice” sized.  Microwave for seven minutes.  I like to substitute cauliflower as is for rice.  Take Indian food for instance.  Our favorite quick meals are the Seeds of Change Indian Simmer Sauces.  I dice and saute some chicken, add a jar of sauce, some peas and crushed tomatoes, serve over cauliflower rice and voila you have an easy dinner loaded with extra veggies.

Don’t stop there.  Turn your “rice” into pizza as well!!

Cauliflower crust pizza is all over the internet these days and honestly, really freaking good!!!  Your basic recipe is 1 to 1 1/2 cup cauliflower rice, 1 cup cheese, 1 egg and spices.  Whatever spices your heart desires.  I like oregano and garlic powder, but dump in whatever floats your boat.  Shape on a well oiled surface (otherwise the edges stick) and bake at 400 degrees till firm and browned around the edges 15 to 20 minutes.  Add your sauce and toppings and broil till melted together.  I would recommend going light on the cheese since the crust is made with it as well.  To be honest, this is more of a knife and fork kinda pizza than a carry to the couch on a paper towel kinda pizza.  The flavor is spot on though.  Try it, you’ll be surprised.

I just might serve this pizza to the in-laws the next time they are in town.

Joanna

Question of the Day:  Would you ride a Segway around town? 

6 Comments

  1. Oh, J, you kill me. You and your blogging pet peeves!

    So…you spoke of jarred roasted rosemary cherry tomatoes. Does that mean you jar? You know how to jar? You will teach me how to jar, yes?

    Also, that crust looks…interesting. About as interesting as the vegan jerky I got in my Foodie Blog Swap box. I’m willing to try it. Wonder if Jeff would notice the different. Be advised, you’ve officially been “pinned”!

    • Yeah, those tomatoes were actually frozen, but I do have all the equipment for water bath canning and I will absolutely teach you!!

      If you pinned me does that mean we have to go to the Homecoming dance together??

  2. Father-in-law

    I was really enjoying your blog until you brought up the length of Paris Hilton’s
    skirt. Then my attention …digressed.

  3. Hi Joanna! First of all I have to say I am so glad that I’m not the only one who noticed the “digression” trend! Loved this post. Second: I nominated your site for the Food Stories Award for Excellence in Storytelling. I posted the details here: http://lipsticknlemondrops.blogspot.ca/2012/05/aww-shucks-im-speechless.html 🙂

    • My Husband wasn’t a huge fan of this post so to him I say “HA” and thanks so much Vesna!! I am touched by the nomination, it means a lot to this newbie blogger. Thanks again!

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